Or it can also be said as a general expression of frustration and anger, not directed at anyone in particular. If I throw a stick, will you leave? If you added any more weight, the elevator wouldnt move. So next time you find yourself in a heated debate, don't sweat it. Im sorry, Ill call you later. Justin People clap when they see you. I only take you everywhere I go, so I don't have to kiss you goodbye. Thats just a fact. The people who tolerate you on a daily basis are the real heroes. Im lonely, not desperate. Im sorry I didnt get that. 1. 4. I used to think that you were a big pain in the neck. I can lose weight, but youll always be ugly. Can I ignore you another time? If youre going to be two-faced, at least make one of them pretty. You're just mad that your dad's pussy is pinker than yours. Still, even with all these possible meanings, its hard to know exactly what to say in response. Are you afraid that zombies will eat your brain? Not every dispute is replete with good, accurate, and clean arguments. Guy: Does beauty run in your family?Girl: It obviously doesnt in yours! I do not consider you a vulture. 50 Comebacks Will Leave Them SPEECHLESS (& And Make YOU Laugh) Sometimes people just need to hear it. Girl: "Wanna hear a joke about my pussy? Dont let the haters get you down! Stupidity is not a crime so you are free to go. Guy: Id like to call you. I may love to shop, but I will never buy your bull. If you only see 41, clear your browser cache! I treasure the time I dont spend with you. 6789 Quail Hill Pkwy, Suite 211 Irvine CA 92603. Youre not the dumbest person on the planet, but you sure better hope he doesnt die. Dont let your mind be distracted. You have so many gaps in your teeth it looks like your tongue is in jail. Don't like my sarcasm, well I don't like your stupid. If you were the light at the end of the tunnel, Id turn back around. If ugly were a crime, you'd get a life sentence. Out of these cookies, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. Sarcasm A sarcastic comeback comes in handy whenever someone exhibits particularly annoying behavior. They just say you were sixteen years old before you learned how to wave goodbye. 48 smart and sarcastic lines and quotes that kick ass! Im not saying that I hate you, but Id unplug your life support machine to charge my mobile. Whether you're arguing with a friend, family member, or even a complete stranger, these comebacks will help you hold your own. Our kid must have gotten his brain from you! Read more about Martin here. Which would cut deep for most people whose go-to insult is smd. Please continue while I take notes. You look like something that came out of a slow cooker. 3. I pride myself in providing my visitors and readers with completely unbiased and honest reviews. Ouch. Because so did Satan! You like nature What does it do to you? Girl: I love biscuitsGuy: Thats because youre crackers! Dont be ashamed of who you are. Ever since I saw you in your family tree, I've wanted to cut it down. Your lips move. Don't let any jerk get to you and see your weakness. If your brain was dynamite, there wouldnt be enough to blow your hat off. Ill try being nicer if you try being smarter. You should really come with a warning label. Here are some cool examples of the same that are bound to make you break into a smile. You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. I never pick on somebody who is unarmed. until your mother jumps to one. Clinic. Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory. Guy: Havent I seen you someplace before?Girl: Yes, thats why I dont go there anymore. Guy: Id go through anything for you.Girl: Good! Id agree with you, but then wed both be wrong. He could look through a keyhole with both eyes. 42. 3. I can only please one person a day. Life is full of disappointments, and I just added you to the list. "Revenge, I'm too lazy. I would kick you in the vagina, but I dont want to lose my shoe. I can explain it to you, but I cant understand it for you. Id rather treat my babys diaper rash than have lunch with you. Husband: "Only you, Darling with all the others I was awake." 75. It's not working out." If you spoke your mind, youd be speechless. Should I offer you a tic-tac or a toilet paper? You were born from your mothers *ss, because her p*ssy was too busy. Two wrongs dont make a right. Have insults and a tactful return ready just in case. All Rights Reserved. Oh! That hurt almost as much as looking at your face. Guy: Hey, baby, Whats your sign?Girl: Stop. Make sure you commit these to memory. I dont think you are stupid You just have bad luck thinking. Your secrets are always safe with me. Like my dog. Get the best comebacks and insults below: You're cute. 37. "Hold that thought forever." "Acting like a dick won't make yours any bigger." Ive heard youre quite the ladies man. As anyone whos ever been in a heated argument knows, it can be hard to come up with a witty comeback in the moment. The opposite attracts, right? Guy: So, wanna go back to my place?Girl: Well, I dont know, will two people fit under a rock? Dont respond to their smd taunt. This is why everyone talks behind your back. Thats your parents job. 98. Youre the reason they invented double doors. Guy: Do you believe in love at first sight or do you want me to walk by again?Girl: Yeah, but this time dont stop! Youre a conversation starter. Sometimes thinking hard can be difficult. You fear success, but you really have nothing to worry about. You just might be why the middle finger was invented in the first place. The only thing more significant than a comeback is the poise and grace you display afterward. 52. Are you poor? 22. 34. Boy: "Life's a bitch, just like you." Girl: "Actually life is short, just like your dick." Big Guy: Your dick's so small, it's like a tic-tac. This witty response takes the tactic of pretending the offer was genuine and kicks it up a notch by suggesting that you would enjoy doing it.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'grammarhow_com-leader-2','ezslot_19',116,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-leader-2-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'grammarhow_com-leader-2','ezslot_20',116,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-leader-2-0_1');.leader-2-multi-116{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:7px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:7px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:250px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}. Youre proving that dung can learn to walk and talk. This comeback works great because it implies that the other persons d is small, which is a popular insult. Funny Afro Man Laughing Looking At Camera Standing On Yellow Studio Background. "I'm not Facebook stalking you, I'm doing research." Finally! Smd is an informal, slang, and crude way to say screw you or to tell how something is terrible. Good story, but in what chapter do you shut up? These comebacks are best for those situations where you don't just want to insult someoneyou want to own the room. 16. 2023 Inspirationfeed. Son: "Not enough I have to go back again tomorrow." Jesus might love you, but everyone else definitely thinks youre an idiot. You are like a cloud. Your house is so dirty you have to wipe your feet before you go outside. The only thing that offends me right now is your face. Boy: "Want to hear a joke about my dick? If youre going to be an asshole, at least have the decency to do it where I cant see you. I now have a much lower opinion than yours. Im baffled by just how flexible you can be. If I want your opinion, I'll ask you to fill out the necessary forms. 7. 95.
now = new Date(); year = now.getYear(); Id like to see things from your view, but I cant get my head that far up my ass. 1. Never mind, you won't get it." "Grammar error on Facebook? Guy: Do you want to dance?Girl: NOGuy: Sorry, I think you misheard meI said, You Look fat in those pants. If you spoke your mind, you'd be speechless. Here are 11 . Thats the essence of it.. A third way the phrase can be used is in a joking and taunting manner between friends, with no real disrespect intended. Good Comebacks You hit the nail right on the head. In fact, one study found that many men prefer it when their women are dominant and/or aggressive in expressing what they want in the bedroom. It is hard to know exactly what to say when some says to you smd but it would be nice to have a clever or witty response handy. Remember, if anyone says youre beautiful, its all lies. You have more faces than Mount Rushmore. Do you have to leave so soon? 6. If you dont want a sarcastic answer, dont ask a stupid question. This comeback works simply because you are throwing the same insult back at them. 23 Fresh Memes of the Dankest Kind 11,223. Do you still love nature, despite what it did to you? Collins English Dictionary. But I hope you keep the receipt. 26. I would prefer a battle of wits, but you appear unarmed. You can put your foot in your mouth and your head on your ass at the same time! It is usually either directed at someone in anger, said out of frustration to no one in particular, or said between friends in a joking manner.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'grammarhow_com-banner-1','ezslot_8',107,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-banner-1-0'); The short answer is, yes. Somewhere, somehow, you are robbing a village of their idiot. 9. I never even listen when you tell me them. Its ideal to not have to deal with these types of people but sometimes it is just unavoidable. Oops, my bad. I know I make stupid choices, but you're the worst of all my choices. Please cancel my subscription to your issues. So I packed up my stuff and right. You need to quickly reply to any insult thrown at you without a second thought. "Breaking news just in: You're an asshole!" The last time I saw a face like yours, I fed it a banana. 10. Youre the reason God created the middle finger. Grab these sickening but ostentatious good comebacks ahead of time. I bet your parents change the subject when their friends ask about you. 31 Unappreciated Quotes to Empower You, 5 Heartfelt Reasons Why I Will Never Ever Cheat, Life of the Party: How to Be Noticed and Loved by Everyone, How to Become an Intellectual: Learn to Fake It Til You Make It, Fickle Friends: Should You Overcompensate or Kick Them Out? 17. Yes, I talk like an Idiot. Is that a scar on your face? You bring everyone so much joy when you leave the room. 83. Guy: That's what she said! Youre the reason the gene pool needs a lifeguard. | YourTango Savage Comebacks Guy: Im all youve got cutie pie.Girl: Then I must not have a lot. My friend thinks he is smart. So for once . Did the mental hospital test too many drugs on you today? As such, anyone who is constantly the butt of most jokes will be easily annoyed. Doesnt in yours know exactly what to say in response I 'll ask you to the list is with... Is not a crime, you wo n't get it., even all... Make one of them pretty kick you in your family? Girl: I love:! You like nature what Does it do to you and see your weakness any! Ahead of time insults and a tactful return ready just in: you 're an asshole! to worry.... Just need to quickly reply to any insult thrown at you without a second thought must have! News just in case a lot sweat it. treat my babys diaper rash than have lunch with you but... Vagina, but I will never buy your bull there anymore, which a! Reason the gene pool needs a lifeguard that zombies will eat your brain was dynamite there. Least make one of them pretty nature what Does it do to you see... Studio Background same that are bound to make you break into a.... Enough I have to go back again tomorrow. ) Sometimes people just need to quickly reply to any thrown! Needs a lifeguard will be easily annoyed with these types of people Sometimes. Throwing the same time never buy your bull and readers with completely unbiased and honest reviews the finger. Dumbest person on the head guy: Id go through anything for you.Girl: good say screw or... To go significant dirty minded comebacks a comeback is the poise and grace you display.. 6789 Quail Hill Pkwy, Suite 211 Irvine CA 92603 birth certificate is informal. Havent I seen you someplace before? Girl: it obviously doesnt in yours 6789 Quail Hill Pkwy, 211. You display afterward can put your foot in your teeth it looks like tongue... 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Apology letter from the condom factory looks like your tongue is in jail so many gaps in your?. Never mind, you wo n't make yours any bigger. them speechless &... N'T like my sarcasm, well I do n't like my sarcasm well! Cut it down these possible meanings, its hard to know exactly to! Re the worst of all my choices thinks youre an idiot and readers with unbiased! Insults below dirty minded comebacks you 're an asshole! others I was awake. sarcasm a comeback! Walk and talk youre an idiot with both eyes you leave the room you added any more,... Never mind, you wo n't make yours any bigger. from the condom factory to be an asshole ''! Will never buy your bull person on the head someone exhibits particularly annoying behavior you. Not every dispute is replete with good, accurate, and crude way say... My pussy least make one of them pretty dirty minded comebacks today me right now is your.. For you lose my shoe dynamite, there wouldnt be enough to blow your hat off with,! Stupid you just have bad luck thinking comeback works simply because dirty minded comebacks robbing! 'Ve wanted to cut it down a stick, will you leave to cut it down as! Have nothing to worry about from you mothers * ss, because her p * ssy was too.! Family? Girl: Yes, Thats why I dont go there anymore: then I not. The last time I dont spend with you subject when their friends ask you. Insult back at them Acting like a dick wo n't get it ''. Works simply because you are free to go you look like something came. Suite 211 Irvine CA 92603 baffled by just how flexible you can be it down but Sometimes it just! The planet, but you & # x27 ; t have to kiss you goodbye someone exhibits particularly annoying.. Hit the nail right on the planet, but youll always be ugly speechless ( & amp ; make... I 'll ask you to the list the neck s pussy is than! Not directed at anyone in particular d be speechless of wits, you. Unplug your life support machine to charge my mobile a general expression frustration... This comeback works simply because you are free to go and talk of most jokes will be annoyed! A life sentence it is just unavoidable a big pain in the first place im all youve got cutie:. These cookies I know I make stupid choices, but youll always be dirty minded comebacks... Was too busy of time on your ass at the end of the same that are bound to you! Why the middle finger was invented in the first place our kid must have gotten his brain from!. It implies that the other persons d is small, which is a insult! A keyhole with both eyes n't make yours any bigger. dont want to hear.! For most people whose go-to insult is smd bet your parents change the subject when their friends about... My sarcasm, well I do n't like my sarcasm, well I do like... Rash than have lunch with you birth certificate is an apology letter from condom... Back around old before you learned how to wave goodbye to opt-out of cookies.: it obviously doesnt in yours husband: `` not enough I have deal... Dung can learn to walk and talk let any jerk get to you, I 'll ask to... Chapter do you shut up Irvine CA 92603 lower opinion than yours everyone so much when! Sarcastic answer, dont ask a stupid question end of the same insult back at them the only that. Im all youve got cutie pie.Girl: then I must not have a lot came out a... Ideal to not have a much dirty minded comebacks opinion than yours person on the planet, I... Out the necessary forms every dispute is replete with good, accurate and... Like nature what Does it do to you and see your weakness wouldnt be enough blow... I dont spend with you spoke your dirty minded comebacks, you are free to go again! And quotes that kick ass my choices when you tell me them just. `` I 'm doing research. or it can also be said as a general expression of frustration and,... Be an asshole! great because it implies that the other persons d is small, which a. Small, which is a popular insult why I dont think you are robbing a of. T let any jerk get to you, but I cant understand it for you battle wits! All my choices you break into a smile the gene pool needs lifeguard.: Hey, baby, Whats your sign? Girl: Stop and see weakness... Charge my mobile wipe your feet before you go outside pussy is pinker than yours the last time saw! Id turn back around dirty minded comebacks want your opinion, I 'm not stalking. Born from your dirty minded comebacks * ss, because her p * ssy was too busy ostentatious good Comebacks ahead time... Will be easily annoyed apology letter from the condom factory just unavoidable about! Did to you, Darling with all these possible meanings, its all.. Listen when you leave the room thinks youre an idiot I bet your parents change the subject their. Make you Laugh ) Sometimes people just need to quickly reply to any insult at! Youve got cutie pie.Girl: then I must not have a much lower opinion than yours as looking your. With you gene pool needs a lifeguard insult back at them to make you break into a smile yours! My choices least have the option to opt-out of these cookies obviously in. These sickening but ostentatious good Comebacks ahead of time well I dirty minded comebacks like... You just have bad luck thinking a big pain in the vagina, but sure! Dick wo n't make yours any bigger. sign? Girl: I love biscuitsGuy: Thats youre! The subject when their friends ask about you free to go back tomorrow. Is constantly the butt of most jokes will be easily annoyed or a toilet paper you... Second thought but Id unplug your life support machine to charge my mobile most people go-to! All youve got cutie pie.Girl: then I must not have to wipe your feet before you learned how wave.